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Dr. Sheron's Blog

Counseling is a good thing for Jay-Z and Beyonce

Mr. and Mrs. Carter are in the midst of marital counseling. This bit of celebrity gossip is not negative at all. It is actually good news that has the potential to build up and sustain marriages around the world. Don’t snicker or point your fingers in judgment. Counseling is not a bad thing or something to be ashamed of. In fact, it is one of the smartest things a couple can do.

The UK Daily Mirror reported the news of the marital counseling. The publication wrote, "It is about maintenance rather than trying to fix anything hugely wrong. They are both happy and their daughter, Blue Ivy, remains their absolute priority.” The Carters have known their therapist for a long time and try to have weekly sessions just to keep communication open and make sure there no issues.

Maintenance is the key to success for all relationships. Quickly dismiss anyone who says that counseling is like airing your dirty laundry in public. They are wrong. Counseling is sitting with a third party who hears both sides and walks the couple toward mutual understanding.

Counseling is maintenance for your marriage, like tune- ups are required for the well-being of your car. If your marriage was a Mercedes, would you take it to the dealership for required maintenance? Yes you would, because you value your car and want to ensure it is prepared for the road. Marriages are even more important than cars. They require maintenance in order to operate smoothly. Maintenance is needed, not when a couple is on the brink of divorce, but just to keep the marriage tuned up.

I am glad the Carters went public with this. The world needs to witness a celebrity married couple valuing their relationship with wise counsel. Most marriages today all would benefit with some counseling time. If you think you can make it on your own, think again. No matter how much you love your spouse, the realities of life barge in and set up obstacles, road blocks and land mines. Let me give you five reasons why your relationship could benefit from counseling, using what I know about the Carters as examples.

They are a working couple.
Working couples need a counselor in the middle of their frantic pace. In the hurry of managing multimillion dollar careers, feelings and emotions may get crushed, overlooked and damaged. Why not have a counselor in the midst to mete out an understanding?

They are parents.
Young parents benefit from a calming, counselor as they figure out their new roles. Babies change a marriage. The couple becomes totally different due to the needs and responsibilities of child rearing. Are they both on the same parenting page? A good counselor can get them there.

They are superstars.
The Carters are at the top of their games. Competition and rivalry are natural emotions that may creep into the marriage. These two music giants did not get to the top by playing shy and bashful. The same ambition that got them to the top must be kept outside the marriage. Counselors help spouses identify and cease aggressive behavior in the marriage.

Infidelity is a possibility.
The cheating allegations indicate trouble in Carter paradise. Infidelity faces many marriages. Whether JayZ did or did not cheat is something an expert can help them privately confront and determine whether trust can be regained.

Neither you nor I live the glamorous life of the Carters, but we, like them have issues that deserve marital counseling. Don't let pride or ignorance break up your happy home. Call a counselor today for a routine check up on your love, if you don’t want it to be- on the run.

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